A woman tells that her desire for motherhood turned into a traumatic experience
Have you wanted to become a mom and then wrap yourself in negative emotions? This was what happened to a woman who spent a lot of money to become a mother and became a mother and was flooded with negative emotions. We tell you the viral story of Alice Mann,
Alice Mann, a pseudonym that the woman decided to use, told the Daily Mail that she dreamed of becoming a mother, so she froze her eggs at the age of 35, now she is 44. Mann says that when she turned 40, she chose to use the sperm of a donor to try to conceive, without success.
A short time later he met someone with whom he formalized and began planning a family. However, nothing worked as the couple had to face in vitro fertilization, a natural pregnancy and a miscarriage.
After failing in all their efforts, the couple opted to use an egg donor and Alice was finally able to get pregnant at the age of 44, this was her eighth IVF. According to the Daily Mail, the woman underwent a “relatively simple caesarean section”, but she accepted that she “did not feel that wave of love” when she put her son on her chest.
“Most of all I felt disbelief that after so long, here he was, he was ours, we were parents,” he explained to the Daily Mail.
Initially, Alice was happy to have become a mother, however after a few weeks she recognized that she was not feeling shock, but rather feelings of “resignation, resentment, horror and misery”.
“For a long time, all I wanted in my life was to be able to be a mother. Now that my dream was a reality, it felt like a complete nightmare from which I wanted to wake up and run far away,” he told the Daily Mail.
Alice calculates that she spent more than 113 thousand dollars to get pregnant (about 2 million 199 pesos), but she realized that she had not enjoyed anything in the whole process. She revealed that she cried her eyes out when she realized that “there wasn’t a part” of motherhood that she was enjoying.
It was at this moment that she began to torment herself about having what she calls “unnatural and unmaternal” feelings and about the mother who “touched” her daughter.
Although Alice “isn’t at the point of using adjectives to describe motherhood yet,” she said things have started to look up and her baby has “begun to become a source of joy, rather than misery.”
“The life we have today is different from the one we abandoned. It is not worse, as I thought it was in the depths of my misery; It is not better, as many would have you believe. It’s just different,” she reflected.